Constant State of Flux
Posted by Jarvis | Filed under Defying Gravity
I can’t handle it. Everything is so overwhelming. When will it all stop? Everything just won’t calm down. My days feel numbered. I’m trying to juggle things, but it’s not working. Why am I even here? I need everything to pay off. I need to stay positive. Please don’t let anything I’ve ever done be in vain. How far will I go?
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next. Amen.
–Reinhold Niebuhr
Tags: flux, Serenity Prayer
Plagued with Uncertainty
Posted by Jarvis | Filed under Defying Gravity
I guess I’m blogging again! Oy vey, the inconsistencies with these things. So REBOOT was pretty much a failure. I media fasted for about 97% of my day, but then didn’t get to the stuff that really mattered–spending time with God. The makeup work was just too much. School’s gonna drive me insane. I just wish that I could really excel, instead of being just passable or great. I work so hard and I just wish that my teachers would notice. Sigh.
I spent the last 2 days chatting online with this guy Edward in my U.S. History class. We really connect, but he’s a pretty messed up guy. I’ve been praying all year for a friend, and I guess he could be it. Are you sure about this, God? I trust you, but…I’m scared that it’s not gonna turn out well. We’ll have to see how this unravels. Should I believe in the Law of Attraction? Isn’t that just another way of believing in God’s power? The world won’t just hand you everything you want on a silver platter, right?
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be open to you.” -Matthew 7:7
Please, God, I know I haven’t been that great of a son, but I need your help. Help me, please.
